Sunday, September 8, 2013

Does It Matter?

Lately I've been a little discouraged with the whole milestone thing. I kind of got in a little funk a few days ago and decided to go ahead and get out the wine for my pity party for one again. I hardly ever get down about milestones. In fact, it's the one thing that really didn't bother me because I knew that he would do all those things some day. I think it has a lot to do with him getting older. As each month passes the delays become more obvious. I know he is behind his typically developing peers, but I also feel like he's behind a lot of his peers with Ds as well. I LOVE seeing all of Camden's friends accomplish something new. I celebrate with them always. I honestly will say that I never get jealous or upset. I think it just hit me one day that he wasn't doing a lot of the things that I thought he would be doing by now. Richard is becoming less sympathetic with my shedding of tears these days. I guess it's because I'm a cry baby about everything. He told me he didn't understand what I was so upset about. After I explained he just said "so what". "Does it matter that he's not doing these things right now? Is it that big of a deal? In fact, I like it a little because I get to have a baby for a little bit longer." Dang...why is he always right?! 

I worry about the things he's not doing but there are a lot of things he is doing too. It's still so weird for me to think I have a nine month old because he really seems more like a five month old right now. He is not able to hold his own bottle and can't self feed yet. I don't mind having to hold him to feed him his bottle because it's just more bonding time. He loves those little puffs but he's not able to hold them, direct them to his mouth, and then eat them. So I usually just sit there and hold them in his mouth until one of us gets tired of it.  

The one big thing we are still waiting on is rolling. The boy does not want to roll either direction. We work on this a lot and I really think he can do it but just doesn't want to. He can roll himself to his side and if I keep my hand behind him so he can't roll back, he will get mad and roll over to his tummy. This makes me think that he can do it. Then again, maybe the entire motion is too much. He stopped rolling from tummy to back about a month ago again too. His therapists don't seem concerned by it so I suppose I shouldn't be either. 

We are also working very hard on sitting. I do feel like there has been a lot of progress in this area. He is not sitting independently, but he can hold his tripod position for much longer periods now. Every once in a while he will sit up for a few seconds but then falls forward to the tripod position. He looks so uncomfortable sitting this way because he seems like he's hunched over so much. His little arms are so darn short that he can't really hold himself up any straighter. It's pretty cute!




Lately his therapists have been working on getting him into the crawling position to get ready for crawling. This skill seems so far off right now, especially since we aren't rolling or sitting. I do understand the importance of working on it now to help build his strength. He actually will get in the position with help, and then lunges forward and does a face plant on the floor. I know he wants to move, he just needs to figure out how. 

The one thing he has gotten excellent at is grabbing! I remember waiting and waiting for him to reach out and touch a toy or my face. He's got that skill down now! He will grab anything above him, to the side of him, or in front of him. The way his face lights up when he touches your cheek is priceless. He can snatch a pair of glasses off your face in less than two seconds. He is also really awesome at grabbing the iPad while watching Baby Signing Time and knocking it on the hardwood floor. Oh man, I kept delaying getting an otter box for it, and now I'm kicking myself.




Camden really is doing so great and we are incredibly proud! We will continue to work hard, but we will make sure we are having fun too. I know in a couple of years I will look back and realize that it does not matter when he does these things. He will do them on his time and no one else's.






10 comments:

  1. First that little man is too cute! I love him! Second, I feel you! I still get pangs when I hear/see what other kids are doing. But we just have to remember they are their own selves and they'll get there.

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    1. Awww...thanks Ginger! I am definitely learning that they are their own person. It just makes the celebration that much sweeter when they do get there!
      Ps...his hair is almost long enough for pig tails too. ;)

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  2. I just love him! I have my moments too every once in a while, and for the life of me, I can't think my way out of it sometimes, even though I know there's no rational reason for it all. It is just so ingrained in us. Kisses to you both. <3

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    1. Thank you sweet friend! I'm just so glad these moments are happening less these days!

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  3. Camden is adorbs! He's got great hair--I'm jealous!

    Believe me when I say this--it is so hard not to worry or get upset about milestones that aren't happening at all or fast enough. I have been there and am often there myself. I have been jealous of others' kiddos accomplishing things that Owen hasn't. I have slowly moved away from those feelings just in the last year. I realized that my kid will do things when he is ready, not when I'm ready. I doubt that's much comfort to you, but I want you to know that you're not alone in your thoughts and feelings and it's OK to have them.

    Owen was nearly a year and a half before he sat up without support. He simply wasn't interested in doing it. Rolling, though? He was all over that because he would get him from Point A to B (and dangerously near his true destination--the stairs!). Every kid has his/her own strengths. Owen's has almost always been gross motor. But hand him a crayon or a pair of scissors and forget about it. He has had no desire until like last week when he started up at preschool again. Camden is doing great, trying sit up! And Owen also sat in the tripod position too.

    Kids in general will often do gross motor stuff "out of order". So even though it might seem weird that his therapist is trying to work on crawling, it's the perfect time for him to learn to work himself into all fours. It'll help his core get stronger too if he can work himself into a crawling position. Do you have the Gross Motor Skills for Children with Down Syndrome book? It's awesome and can give you some more ideas too.

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    1. Stephainie, your words are very comforting! I have nothing to go by and so I often turn to others like you that have paved this road ahead of me. No matter how hard I try, it still bugs me. I remind myself over and over that these types of things are no big deal. I guess it's just human nature though to feel this way. It's very reassuring to hear from you all because I know it will happen and it will be okay!

      I do have the book, but I must admit I don't use it religiously like I should. I think it may be time for me to get it back out and actually use it properly. I think I got so frustrated in the beginning so I just tossed it to the side. I definitely need to find it now!

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  4. I pretty much wrote this same blog post last week. I had an "Oh poop, my son isn't doing XYZ" moment and spilled it out into my blog. So yeah, I get you. Hugs. But he's totally cute!

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    1. I remember reading that Heather and not even a few days later Is when I got in the same funk. I have a feeling it won't be the last time but at least we have each other to turn to!

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  5. I know I have told you this before, but the milestone thing and worrying about it and being sad over it, is the one thing I would go back and change if I could. Cause in the end it just didn't matter when Russell started doing any of those things. Your posts are so similar to what mine were two years ago, so I totally get what you are feeling.
    Camden could not be any cuter!

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    1. Thank you Jenny! You may have to tell me about fifty more times. Then maybe I'll get it in my head that it doesn't matter. Ugh, I'm slowly learning. ;)

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